Feeling the way I do is so isolating.
I have reached out to friends, family, even strangers online. But what can I expect them to do?
I have spoken to both of my aunts and two of my brothers explaining how I feel.. they all replied untill they stopped. Just stopped. I’ve been left on read on every conversation.
My parents are a bit old fashioned, ignorant, unempathetic – unsupportive. They just tell me how much of a nightmare i’ve been recently. How my suicide attempt and taking antidepressants for months was all for attention.
I don’t want to do this anymore.
Even this blog, people have just stopped looking, stopped reading.
Noone I talk to can handle the weight of my feelings yet i’m supposed to carry this all by myself? They can’t be fucked to deal with it and it’s not even there issue. I’m the one suffering.
Noone really cares. I’ve said it multiple times before and i’ll say it again. When i’m there for someone, I am there. When they need me I am there for them. Why can I not receive that? Even the strangers who are suffering that I used to help on facebook… I made sure I was always there and if for some reason I couldn’t be I would explain.
I drew the photo above the other day. It’s shit but I needed to draw how I felt.
Thanks for reading, noone.
Sorry my depressing thoughts are too negative for you. I understand. If I could leave my thoughts on read and never hear from them again I would too.